Mk Zariel, United States (it/its)

“I would want my younger self to know that feminism isn't a gender expression or identity—it's a strand of liberation that absolutely anyone can participate in.“

Was there a definitive moment you realized you were trans? How old were you?

I realized I was trans when I was around fourteen. Before that, I thought my feelings of masculinity were just because I was a feminist—I'd only learned about first and second wave feminism, and because a lot of those movements were about women wanting the freedom to do supposedly "masculine" things if they so chose, I assumed that feeling like a butch/masc individual, closer to a boy than a girl, was solely because of my feminism. All that changed when I became an anarchist, and met anarchist+feminist organizers who were very feminine and didn't have any desire to dress or act like a stereotypically masculine individual would. As a result, I started thinking that maybe my gender identity was its own thing, not just a product of my feminism. My new anarchist friends then educated me about being trans.

How soon after did you start to make changes? What were these changes?

Once I realized I was trans, I started using a new name and pronoun a few months later. I also cut my hair and started wearing more gender-affirming clothes, and I started being more open about wanting to be a butch individual in butch/femme dynamics.

Have these changes started to make you feel more comfortable in your life and body?

Yes, absolutely! I still get dysphoric sometimes, but only when cis men are judgy about what my body looks like or how I perform gender.

What would you tell your younger self? Would you do anything differently?

I would want my younger self to know that feminism isn't a gender expression or identity—it's a strand of liberation that absolutely anyone can participate in—and that as a result, feeling butch/masculine is its own thing and is super valid as well.

Is there anything else you'd like to share?

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Have the gender-affirming steps you’ve taken impacted your overall happiness and sense of well-being?

Yes.