Robin, Germany (he/him)

“It's never too late to transition."

Was there a definitive moment you realized you were trans? How old were you?

I had the first inklings of it in my early 20s, but I didn't fully realize that I was trans until I was 27 years old. However, even before that point, there were signs in my childhood. In my teenage years I always presented myself as a boy (to the point I was using voice changers so nobody found out I wasn't) and preferred to be called by masculine names. Most of my hobbies and interests were also stereotypically masculine, but I thought for a long time I might just be a tomboy.

How soon after did you start to make changes? What were these changes?

It wasn't until the Internet allowed me to have more resources and hear about other people's experiences that I started to realize that I don't have to "tolerate" living as woman, but that I could transition and live as the person that I always felt I was on the inside. My changes were quite gradual and began with using he/him pronouns in online spaces and with my closest friends. I started to test out masculine pronouns and purchased a binder that I could wear. Over time, this also began to bleed into my real life. In Germany it's unfortunately still required to go through quite extensive therapy before you can begin HRT, so it took me nearly 3 years before I could start taking testosterone. But now I've been a bit over a year on testosterone, had my mastectomy last year, and in a few months I'll have my name officially changed as well!

Have these changes started to make you feel more comfortable in your life and body?

These changes have absolutely improved the way I regard my own body and how I feel mentally. I always hated my body and being perceived as a woman. It just never felt right. Now I actually feel comfortable, enjoy going out, love trying out different clothes and styles that suit my body. I genuinely couldn't be happier and I would do it all over again. Being recognized by other people for how you've always felt is a feeling that cannot be bought with money.

What would you tell your younger self? Would you do anything differently?

Sometimes, it's tempting to think about what my life could have been like if I had started my transition earlier. I think if I could go back in time, that's the only thing I would change because I spent so many years of my life not feeling comfortable and at peace with my identity. However, I've also found that it's never too late to transition. Although I might be a bit older now, I still ended up exactly where I needed to be, and I'd love to tell my younger self that I'll be fine in the end regardless.

Is there anything else you'd like to share?

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Have the gender-affirming steps you’ve taken impacted your overall happiness and sense of well-being?

Yes.