Taylor, United States (he/him)

"Don't try to control how others see you, especially early in your journey. Be honest with your most loved ones, but let strangers judge you all they want."

What made you realize you were trans? How old were you?

I was 12, maybe 13, when I realized my body wasn't developing in the way that I wanted. Well, I didn't know what way I wanted it to develop, per se; I just knew that what was naturally happening was hurting me. I think I fully accepted that I wasn't a girl around age 14-15.

When did you start making changes? What were these changes?

I made my first binder out of spare fabric, elastic bands, and a zipper when I was 13. (God that thing hurt, lol.) I was 15 when I came out as nonbinary to my friends on Tumblr, and I was 22 when I called my family and told them I would be starting testosterone HRT. I also decided I would go strictly by he/him that year, and fully socially transitioned. At age 24 I got top surgery; at age 25, my hysterectomy. (I also got genital piercings starting at age 23.)

Have these changes started to make you feel more comfortable in your life and body?

Absolutely. I can do so much now that I couldn't back in the day. I make friends at the bars, I hit on hot people, I exercise without losing my breath to a binder, I go swimming without shame... I can even shower and look in the (waist-up) mirror after, haha. (Still working on that bottom dysphoria!)

What would you tell your younger self? Would you do anything differently?

Don't try to control how others see you, especially early in your journey. Be honest with your most loved ones, but let strangers judge you all they want. If I could go back, I wouldn't fully socially transition until at least my voice had dropped. Ultimately I'm glad I stuck up for myself, but it did cause a lot of chaos in my life that could have been avoided by biding my time and not worrying about others' perceptions of me.

Is there anything else you'd like to share?

Intramuscular injections aren't as scary as you'd think! I was terrified at first, and made a nurse walk me through my first injection. Looking back, I could have just watched a YouTube video and saved myself a trip to the hospital, haha. Also, if you're on Medicaid, look at your state laws regarding gender-affirming surgery. For example, IN has no laws forbidding Medicaid coverage for GAC, and I was able to get my hysto 100% covered.

Have the gender-affirming steps you’ve taken impacted your overall happiness and sense of well-being?

Yes.