W.A., United States (he/they)

“I would tell my younger self to trust yourself, stop the noise or fear from letting you meet yourself."

Was there a definitive moment you realized you were trans? How old were you?

I was born in the late 1980s, so I certainly didn't have language for it then but I was obsessed with the boys in my elementary school, not like I liked them but I studied them. I wanted their clothes, shoes, haircuts, the way they got to run and be picked first for captains and to help do things outside. I remember thinking it wasn't right, I was being grouped in the wrong spots and didn't need to always be put with the girls. In college I met my first trans person, they were a friend of my first girlfriends. Everything about queer culture was new and exciting to me then, but I had a quiet interest in this trans person and that was the first years of "The Facebook" and I would stalk their page, stare at them at parties I knew thats all I wanted ... but it took about 12 more years, leaving my home state, and the COVID lockdown living alone to finally push me to transition.

How soon after did you start to make changes? What were these changes?

I came out as a lesbian and presented what I thought was more masc (tom boy at best) but around age 31-32 I started really changing - cut my hair off, started T.

Have these changes started to make you feel more comfortable in your life and body?

Absolutely.

What would you tell your younger self? Would you do anything differently?

I wish I would have transitioned so much sooner. I feel like I missed so much life, but I am grateful for my journey now. I would have started that first time I got that feeling though in college, where I just knew. I would tell my younger self to trust yourself, stop the noise or fear from letting you meet yourself.

Is there anything else you'd like to share?

Transition is not linear, just like life is not linear it will change over time and thats something to embrace, not fear. Also, don’t look at the Trans influencer people on social media, they are the celebrities of trans world and just like real hollywood a lot of it isn't real or attainable.

Editor’s note: While we respect all viewpoints shared in these stories, we’d like to offer a different perspective regarding trans influencers. For many in the community, trans influencers provide invaluable insight, visibility, and support, especially when it comes to navigating hormone therapy and other aspects of transition. By sharing their experiences publicly, these individuals help bring awareness and representation to a group that is often underrepresented. Their willingness to give up anonymity can make a significant impact, offering guidance and inspiration for those who may feel isolated in their journey.

Have the gender-affirming steps you’ve taken impacted your overall happiness and sense of well-being?

Yes.